A little world of our own*
By Lauren Raymond
I recently watched the new episode of Shabbat.com’s “Soon by You”. What caught my attention, was that one of the characters did not have Facebook, or any other social media connection.
How refreshing! Something I can actually connect to! This is so because I am in the same blessed situation.
Almost 5 years ago, I had a smart phone, and a Facebook account. Oh how I loved sitting for hours not only connecting with friends, but also scanning through the many pages of wedding photos – of friends of friends, of people with whom I had absolutely no connection whatsoever!! My husband (who had taken himself off Facebook after our engagement) gently and considerately suggested that I take myself off Facebook and enjoy spending my voyeuristic hours on somethings more meaningful. I declined. Many times. How on earth would I still keep in contact with all my friends across the globe? How would I know who is having a simcha? I needed Facebook to keep these connections – it was the only way!!
Or so I thought.
On a belated honeymoon to Israel with our 2 kids, and my Mom(!), I realised that all the people I needed so desperately to keep in contact with, were as easily reached with an email, or by a phone call. We were so busy while we were there, that I had no time to sit and flick through photos of friends’ friends. And you guessed it – I didn’t even miss it. Not one little bit. I actually enjoyed it!
So on our return to Australia, I decided to quit Facebook. No more pings, no more notifications, no more threads to follow. My quality time with my kids and my husband improved dramatically, and I had no pressure to post witty comments for others to ‘like’. In a way, I felt liberated from a slavery that I had no idea I was consumed by.
I kept in contact with friends and family the not-so-old-fashioned way – emails and phone calls. In fact, it made relationships even more meaningful. To send out or receive a fully personalised email with photo attachments not targeted to the 1,283 friends who may or may not see it, felt special.
I am fully aware that in this day and age, social media, as well as smart phones, are part and parcel of society. Despite this, I think it may be a healthy point to consider that concerning most things in life, we have a choice. We can choose to be plugged in 24/6 to our technology, we can choose to make parameters and discipline ourselves with limited times on our phones, and we can also choose to disconnect completely, and to reconnect with a feeling of times gone by. A time when family and the ‘here and now’ felt more real, more colourful, and more personal.
I’m not preaching for people to leave their social media fortresses, I’m just throwing out the idea to be able to appreciate our lives in a way where a space free of preoccupation and distraction could lay a foundation of unique memories, unmarred by the pesky pings that we have become all too familiar with.
*Thank you to Hamodia for allowing us to publish this.
